500 years from now, future archaeologists will be digging in what was once the great city of Tampa. Buried under centuries of sediment from the Great Flood of 2042 they will uncover great buildings. These buildings will be unknown to them, and they will work feverishly digging out the clues to determine their origin, and more importantly, their use. They will find machines of all kinds, but their purpose will be unknown to them …
… until they find the keystone. The one artifact that unlocks the secret to the entire building …
It’s style is unknown to these future scientists. It has an upright section with a myriad of buttons, most with a + sign or a – sign. There is a screen that looks like it employed a series of led lights, which appeared to measure some sort of output. Along the bottom of this machine was a track of some type, akin to a belt used in small cages to give pets a sort of exercise.
Is this piece of equipment for exercise? Did people of the twentieth century employ machines to exercise on?
This is quickly discarded as an unlikely hypothesis. This area was known for its sun and sand, a playground for the rich and those lucky enough to serve them by living here. This was part of what used to be Central Florida. With such temperate climate there would have been no need for indoor exercise equipment.
No … this equipment had another purpose. Perhaps a more sinister one. It is found along side other pieces of equipment that had various ropes and pulleys, attached to what seems like weighted slabs of metal.
It finally dawns on them. They have discovered a palace of torture. Perhaps a place where prisoners of war were sent to garner information from them. In fact, a table is discovered that had straps attached to it. Obviously for water boarding. In another room a large basin is found, at least 25 yards in length, with ladders built into the walls. Residue found in the sediment showed it was once full of salt water. Another form of exercise? No … with an area surrounded by water and many lakes, why would anyone need to exercise in the water inside a building … ?
Obviously another form of torture …
These people of the twentieth century were truly barbaric weren’t they now? The archaeologists shake their heads. They must have had many many people in need of torture because these buildings are found sprinkled all over the area, with names like “LAF”, probably meaning the company that was contracted by the government to carry out the orders, and “LFF”, which seems to have been the same company as LAF.
They laugh amongst themselves as they gather their tools and artifacts for the trip back inland. “this was the time of sugar consumption, after all,” the lead scientist states. “It addled the mind and caused complacency, and a culture of slovenly people, as evidenced by the documentary discovered last year called Wall-E.”
Because, seriously, who would ever run on a machine right?